Nico's feelings book
by the flamingo pen
Summary: Nico doesn't have a diary - he has a feelings book, where he writes about the people in his life, depending on what mood he's in. It's better than it sounds!
1. This is not a diary

_**Nico's feelings book**_

 _ **Just to get this out of the way – this is not a diary. This is a feelings book. If you call it a diary, I will have your soul tortured eternally in the fields of punishment.**_

 _ **This is a feelings book. Jason got it for me. He said "it's to write in whenever you feel very emotional."**_

 _ **He's such a dork.**_

 _ **I don't think I'll write about myself when I write in here though. I think I'll write about people. The people that being in a certain mood makes me think of. Make sense?**_

 _ **No, not to me either.**_

 _ **I'm going to go now, before I start pouring my soul out into the book. Can't risk having someone read something I don't want them to.**_

 _ **Nico**_

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This is a random idea that came to me last night, so hope you all like it! If you want to hear Nico talk about a certain emotion (or person, I suppose), just review or PM me.

Thanks for taking the time to read!

Flamingo


	2. Security and Safety - Jason

_**Security/safety**_

 _ **Jason Grace is a dork.**_

 _ **And that's the truth. I should know. I play board games with him. He always messes up in the funniest ways.**_

 _ **Also, he does that thing a lot when he leaves his glasses on his forehead and then goes looking for them. Me and Piper love messing with him – we tell him we saw them in his cabin, then laugh a lot when he thanks us and walks off.**_

 _ **Jason also has a scar from when he tried to eat a stapler. Thalia is always teasing him about it. She literally destroys every stapler she comes across and proclaims that it's to keep him safe.**_

 _ **Me and Reyna like making jokes about his name – specifically his last name. Grace. It's a gold mine for bad puns. Hazel always tells us off, but we keep doing it anyway. It's funny. Also, he brought this on himself. He doesn't want us to call him Jace, and Calling him Sparky or Superman just feels a little weird to me. So his nickname is Grace.**_

 _ **Also, even though his very worst fear is turning out like his mum, his fear of bricks is right up there on the top ten list. You have to be a dork to be afraid of bricks.**_

 _ **Jason's is a dork because he's so easy to prank, as well. And he won't get mad, like some people (read: me). Piper and I are the usual suspects – we tease him so much, we think we should get matching t-shirts that say 'we're with Dumbo'. Then his can say 'I'm Dumbo'. These are the kind of things we come up with at three in the morning, in Reyna's bedroom, whenever we have sleepovers. That and reasons why I should get together with Will.**_

 _ **I always associate Jason with the colour yellow, because I associate yellow with the sun. And Jason is like a sun – he's warm and bright, and he always makes you feel a little more secure, or a little safer. That's why I wrote about him today. I'm feeling very secure. Also, his favourite colour's yellow.**_

 _ **There's a big difference between how I feel about Percy and how I feel about Jason. Percy was always an idol to me – an unrequited love, more of a legend than a friend. But Jason – Jason's my best friend. And that's why I now prefer him to Percy. To be honest, sometimes with Percy it's kind of awkward unless Jason's there.**_

 _ **But the reason Jason is a really big dork: he's so nice. He barely ever gets angry or petty, he's always there for people he considers his friends, even if they aren't always the best to him (read: me). And he doesn't ever exclude anyone, even if everyone else doesn't like them. He's actually a really stubborn dork, but sometimes it's nice to have a stubborn dork to be there for you.**_

 _Aww, thanks Nico_

 _ **Damn it Jason! You're not supposed to read my**_ __ _ **feelings book!**_

 _Sorry. Guess I'm just too much of a stubborn dork :P_

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Well, what did you think?

If you think it's great, great! Please keep reading! If you think it's ridiculous, oh well! Thank you for bothering to read!

Flamingo


	3. Powerful and Brave - Reyna

Thank to everyone who has read my story so far! Here's the next chapter, about Reyna, as asked by two people out of three!

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 _ **Powerful/brave**_

 _ **Today, I beat all of my sword fighting opponents, scaled the lava wall, and managed to actually make something worth keeping in arts and crafts (I'll admit it – I'd forgotten to get a present for Hazel's birthday. That is the only reason I was in there). This made me feel good – powerful. And that's why I'm writing about Reyna.**_

 _ **What's the first thing that jumps into anyone's head when they think of Reyna Avila Ramirez-Arellano?**_

 _ **(And yes, I only put her full name in there to annoy her, should she ever find this.)**_

 _ **Strong. Brave. Powerful. Proud.**_

 _ **And it's all true – but in the wrong sense. If you were to ask this hypothetical person why, they would reply that it's because she's a daughter of Bellona, or because she's praetor. But in my opinion, it's the way she feels about other people that pushes her to be these things.**_

 _ **Sure, as a daughter of Bellona and the descendant of many great warriors and pirates (so jealous), she gets an advantage, but she doesn't have to lend her strength to people (though I'm glad she does). She doesn't have to shoulder these enormous amounts of responsibility. She doesn't have to stay strong – she doesn't have to put up a front.**_

 _ **But she does it anyway. Why, Nico? You ask. Why would she?**_

 _ **Because she cares too much. She cares too much about her fellow demigods to see them falter in battle, so she lends them her strength even though it puts a weight on her for each and every one of them. She cares too much about others to let them feel sad for her. She cares too much to let them share her burden. To be honest, I think it's her fatal flaw. She can't let others step up for her, because if they get hurt, she'll feel it's her own fault, and she can't bear to let that happen.**_

 _ **I think, though she never really talks about it, it all started when her dad attacked Hylla and she dispelled his ghost. She felt personally responsible for Hylla getting hurt – she thinks if she hadn't been protecting Reyna at the time, she would have been alright.**_

 _ **What Reyna doesn't realise though, is that some people are meant to take responsibility of her protection; her family, her friends. Then again, you can't blame her for that. She was raised without a mother by a paranoid war survivor who was being egged on by her ancestors, with only her sister caring about her.**_

 _ **But, going back to my earlier point (recap: what would most people think of Reyna) there is a small group of people who think differently. And no, I'm not talking about monsters who see her as a tasty snack.**_

 _ **I'm talking about me. And Jason. And Piper. And Hazel, and Frank, and all of the seven. I'm talking about her friends.**_

 _ **Were you to ask us what Reyna's like, we'd say:**_

 _ **Strong. Brave. Powerful. Proud.**_

 _ **But also…**_

 _ **Fun. Sarcastic. Loyal. Caring. Teasing. Competitive. And above all: A good friend.**_

 _ **She's got a flair for strategy, and you know you'll win anything with her on your side. Except maybe being tied to a burning stake with twenty immortal giants who want to eat you- Nah. She's Reyna. She'd get us out.**_

 _ **She's also rather cynical, which makes it impossible to watch a film with her. She'll burst out laughing at the sad bits, then talk over the rest of it, mimicking the characters surprisingly impressively. In many ways, she and I were made to be friends.**_

 _ **Another one of Reyna's many impressive traits is that she is the most competitive person you've ever met. Even in something like thumb wars, she has to come out on top or she'll sulk for ages. Therefore, she has managed to break several people's thumbs. It's lucky she's so good at everything, otherwise we'd be in for major tantrums.**_

 _ **That's one of the things people don't know about her, because they don't get to know her. Yes, Reyna throws tantrums. It's surprising to everyone who hasn't really interacted with her, because they think of her as this emotionless, stoic figure. But she's not like that – she laughs, she gets angry, frustrated, she shouts, she runs, she gives bone-crushing hugs, she'll have her dogs rip things to shreds … just regular demigod things.**_

 _ **That's the problem. People don't seem to think of her as human. But she is. She has human emotions, and human needs – she just keeps her emotions in check, and suppresses her needs for the needs of others, because she's so caring.**_

 _ **Reyna's my inspiration. Every day, she keeps my spirit going, keeps me from melting into the shadows, and keeps me from fleeing to dad's palace. She's what I always dreamed to be, but could never achieve.**_

 _ **I guess that's just Reyna though.**_

 _Aww, this one's cute too!_

 _ **Get out of my feelings book Jason!**_

 _Jeez Nico, your closet? Such a predictable hiding place. And no, I won't. I think I'll show this to Reyna now._

 _ **DAMN YOU GRACE!**_

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Well, what did you think? Hope you liked it!

Flamingo


	4. Regret - Thalia

_**Regret**_

 _ **I won't lie. Even now when I look at Thalia Grace I feel regretful. It's not like we're on bad terms anymore – we never were, really – but every time I look at her I'm reminded of the organization that led Bianca to her death, tantalizing her with their promises of freedom and responsibility only to force her onto a practically hopeless quest that cost her her life.**_

 _ **Do I sound bitter? I'm not bitter.**_

 _ **Well fine, I am pretty bitter.**_

 _ **Thalia in herself is a great person. She's funny, loyal, never overly cheerful, and she likes all the same music as me. She cares greatly for Jason, but she can also tease him, just like the best sisters should be able to.**_

 _ **She and Jason are alike in a few ways – they're both strong, independent people who would do anything for their family and friends, are both reasonably insecure about turning out as their mother, and because of her broken promises they are fiercely loyal.**_

 _ **But they are also very different, and not only looks wise. Their mother's death caused Thalia to become defensive and prickly. It caused Jason to always play by the rules and keep his promises no matter what. Also, when you tease Jason, he'll frown at you and be a good sport. If you tease Thalia, she'll fry your eyebrows off.**_

 _ **Just between you and me now, feelings book, I'm breaking down writing this. I don't know why I even started. Oh I may sound like I'm talking about something nice and happy, but you know what I'm actually talking about?**_

 _ **A brother and sister. Siblings who thought each other were dead. And then found each other. Then flaunt their sibling love in other people's faces.**_

 _ **If anything, this is the reason I can barely look at Thalia. Earlier, I said she had the qualities of a great sister. She and Jason, the way they are with each other, it reminds me of Bianca and myself so much my heart aches when I see them. So I plaster on my well-used fake smile and carry on. Then I go back to my cabin and throw things.**_

 _ **But the reason I feel regret when I look at Thalia (instead of anger or sadness or loneliness) is because it wasn't her fault. She wasn't with the hunters when Bianca died, and though she was on the quest Percy made it clear to me that she couldn't have helped (**_ _ **he**_ _ **probably could have, but that's beside the point). The thing I feel about her is regret because she then joined. Another poor girl lost to the hunters. And then she started collecting more and more people, making me feel worse unintentionally, because it's like she's trying to erase all the girls of the past – and not just Bianca, others as well.**_

 _ **Well, I think I'm going to go now. I can hear Jason knocking. That reminds me, I've got to put this somewhere he won't find it.**_

 _Oh gods Nico, I didn't know you felt like this. You should tell me man! I'll try to be more thoughtful… btw, under your mattress is so predictable._

 _ **I WILL HAVE YOU BURN IN TARTARUS JASON!**_

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Poor Nico. And bad Jason!

Hope you like it! Wasn't really my favourite one, but, who knows? Maybe it'll be yours!

Flamingo


	5. Love - Hazel

_**Love**_

 _ **Now, I'm betting you're going to think this entry is about Bianca, right? Or maybe even Will? Well you're wrong. This is about Hazel.**_

 _ **And by the way, I am not in love with Will. Stop thinking that.**_

 _ **Moving on...**_

 _ **The love I feel for Hazel is stronger than the love I've ever felt for anyone – yes, even Bianca. Maybe it's something to do with being the older sibling, and feeling so much more protective (even though it's only by about six months).**_

 _ **Anyway, I love Hazel. She's the best little sister I could have ever asked for. She understands me better than anyone, and she always know what to say. She does all these little things that are so uniquely Hazel it's adorable.**_

 _ **For example, the other day Frank showed us his laptop, and Hazel's eyes just lit up like a Christmas tree. She was literally shining with amazement – and maybe envy. Speaking of Christmas, you should have seen how happy she was when we got her that camera. She**_ _ **spent the entire day sneaking up behind us and shouting "cheese!"**_

 _ **So endearingly annoying.**_

 _ **She's also the only person who I really feel challenged by when we play board games. Frank has introduced us to many new board games that have been made since we were ... Out of it.**_

 _ **That's another great thing about Hazel. She understands being confused by all the new technology and the new words people use, and the new attitude they have to life, to people of different sexual orientation, genders, races, and everything like that. She understands what it's like to feel that you can't ever fit into this time. But one thing poor Hazel has to realise that I never will is that now people of her colour have equal rights to everyone else. For example, when I was taking her to Camp Jupiter when we had got out of hell (a.k.a Dad's place), we had to travel by bus. She was already so amazed by all the new things she'd seen that she didn't even notice me paying, and moving to get on. When she did she me climb on, she smiled at me quickly and started walking the other way. I was very worried about her, of course, so watching her deliberately walk away was terrifying. I shouted her, got off the bus and grabbed her hand, pulling her back on. We sat down in the nearest available seats, and that's when I asked her why she had walked away. She said: 'I was going to get on the back way. My mum always said you had to be quick or they'd go without you'. I only realised after a few seconds what she meant. And then … I don't really know the words to describe what I felt. We had a very long and needed conversation about equal rights on the way to the camp, that's for sure.**_

 _ **Hazel never ceases to amaze me either. Like yesterday, when she used a sneaky trick to make me drop my sword in combat. No one has ever made me drop my sword before. Or when I found out, just two months ago, that she was actually a really strong swimmer. She can practically keep up with Percy – okay, she's not that good. But she did come second.**_

 _ **Anyway, I just wanted to talk about my lovely little sister and all the lovely things she does. Because today, I am feeling rather happy. And it's strange, but I like it.**_

 _You guys had a race without me? Aw, now I'm upset._

 _ **Shut up, go away and drop the book!**_

 _In that order :P?_

… _**I really can't stand you sometimes.**_

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I have returned!

Sorry I've been off so long, I had a lot of stuff to do. But now I'm back, and hopefully soon I can get a big new story I'm planning out (hopefully).

Flamingo


	6. Warmth - Leo

_**Warmth**_

 _ **Leo came up to me today. We had a short conversation. He called me Death Boy three times, and told me I should try out a smile for once. Then he laughed and left.**_

 _ **Usually, this would make me angry. But it didn't. It left me feeling annoyed, definitely, but warm.**_

 _ **That's the sort of effect Leo has on people. That lovable annoyance, that heart-warming idiocy. You can't seem to not like Leo. He's always feels so friendly, and he always has a smile on his face – even if he's usually laughing at some crap joke he made … or you – and you can tell he always tries.**_

 _ **Not to say, of course, that he isn't annoying. I find Leo very annoying. Most of the time, I can't stand more than five minutes in his presence. Although, this might be an over-protective brother issue.**_

 _ **I love Hazel. And Frank's a great guy. And I would much rather Hazel be going out with Frank than Leo. Luckily I don't have to worry about that anymore, now Calypso's here, but still, I've probably harboured some of that tension.**_

 _ **Because that's what I do. I harbour things (makes me sound like a port). Leo, on the other hand, doesn't.**_

 _ **Leo is like the opposite of me. He makes an effort to hide his scars, to keep his pain hidden from the world, whereas I must admit, I don't often tend to care what people think about me. And Leo always tries to be nice, which is something I can't say I'm fond of doing.**_

 _ **He just seems to be this bubble of energy, jumping around hyperactively, keeping you on your toes and dancing around you like a naiad.**_

 _ **I've only ever seen that bubble break once.**_

 _ **It was a few months ago, when Leo had just got back from 'being dead'. I was wandering through the forest when I heard noises coming from a huge face of rock. So I went over to it, and there were these enormous doors, swung open, seemingly carved from the stone.**_

 _ **I went inside, and followed the noises. I was met with Leo. He looked like he was in the middle of something, but something looked a lot like a broken engine. He kept cursing at it and hitting it with his wrench. Eventually he just slumped to the floor and curled up. I started to feel uncomfortable, so went to leave. The last thing I heard him say was "Why can't I do anything right?"**_

 _ **That very afternoon, he was jumping around as usual, his cheerful grin restored on his face, his eyes shining again. But seeing him like that made me look at him differently.**_

 _ **I realised that we're not so different. We both lost our mothers, and both had to deal with being tossed around like a bundle of clothes no one wants. But at least I had Bianca there with me, to look out for me. Leo had no one.**_

 _ **But he still came out of it smiling. He cracks bad jokes, makes sarcastic comments, laughs at himself. These are still things I'm having to remember how to do. And it just all seems to come so naturally to him.**_

 _ **He's like a flame, blazing around and warming everyone else with the heat of his jolliness. You can't stand near him without feeling a little better, even if it's only a miniscule amount.**_

 _ **But all flames need kindling every now and then.**_

 _ **So I've taken to leaving piles of wood on his bed marked 'for the fire boy' in the hope that it'll give him the laugh I get from him every day.**_

 _ **He keeps glaring at me though, so I'm not sure he understood the message.**_

 _Jeez Nic, who knew you could be so adorable? All these little entries are so sweet!_

 _ **Jason, you bought me this book, if you want me to use it then STAY OUT! And DON'T call me NIC!**_

 _Alright Co, calm down._

 _ **JASON!**_

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Thanks for the lovely reviews! This was Calefe's request.

I'll update sooner next time, promise!

Flamingo


	7. Admiration - Frank

_**Admiration**_

 _ **Hazel showed me her artwork today. I never realised how good she actually was – she gets all the shading right, the light, the size of the features … I can barely draw a ghost.**_

 _ **Anyway, I admire her more and more every day. So that's why I decided to write about Frank.**_

 _ **I associate Frank with admiration for two main reasons. The first one is easy: I love the guy.**_

 _ **Frank's the best boyfriend any brother could want their sister to bring home. He's sweet, protective, friendly, humble, scared of me … what more could you want? And, of course, Hazel likes him. That's what matters most.**_

 _ **Also, in general, Frank's possibly the best person I've met. He doesn't have any dirty secrets or regrets, he never judges, he seems to love everyone else unconditionally (I mean, within reason. Not anyone like Hera … or Leo…) He's like this jovial, clumsy puppy you can't help but to love. And sometimes, I mean that literally.**_

 _ **Also, I admire the way he deals with everything. Your life is tied to a stick? If you're not Frank Zhang, you've hidden it, and yourself, in a cave far far away by now. But not Frank Zhang. He's got it tied in this little bag on his belt, and he's still able to be at ease with the world. You can turn into practically any animal, including a dragon? Most would fly around all day, torching trees for fun. But Frank's favourite transformations are into small, cuddly creatures, because (he actually said this and everything) 'most days, he doesn't feel soft enough'.**_

 _ **Now I'm not trying to say Frank doesn't have any faults. He does. He puts the shower gel into the cupboard when he's finished with it and makes it impossible to find. He turns into animals in his sleep. He has absolutely no clue what to do when presented with a child (I mean, he's worse than me. That's really bad.) But for anything that matters…**_

 _ **He's the ideal boyfriend, friend and person. But there's another reason I associate Frank Zhang with admiration.**_

 _ **He seems to admire everyone else.**_

 _ **He awes over Annabeth's brain, wows at Jason and Percy's supernatural abilities. He's amazed by Leo's mechanical knowledge (although he doesn't always show it) and was completely knocked away by the stable of pegasi at Camp Half-Blood (barely ever leaves the place). But the great thing about Frank is that none of this admiration ever seems fake or forced. He's literally just in wonder of practically everything.**_

 _ **I'm not trying to show him as one of those suck-up admirers. Frank's not like that. He's so funny and friendly with the way he compliments you, it's a while before you actually realise how much he's just said about you, and the level of admiration that follows it.**_

 _ **But he brushes it off like nothing when anyone awes at his powers, or compliments him on battle strategy, or anything of the sort. You can always tell he's pleased, but he's always not believing it, turning the attention off himself.**_

 _ **About four paragraphs ago, I listed one or two of Frank's faults. But there's only one, really, that has any impact…**_

 _ **Frank Zhang doesn't admire himself enough.**_

 _At this rate, they'll find me dead in my cabin from a cuteness overload, holding your diary!_

 _ **Jason! It's not a diary! And believe me, I would be very happy if you were to die right now!**_

 _You wouldn't really, you love me on the inside. I should know, I reread the first chapter every time I open this book :P_

 _ **Ugh. You despicable person.**_

 _Nico, you spelt wonderful wrong._

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Hi again!

Thanks to everyone for all the amazing reviews! They really made my day.

As a response to Lanvender5687's question, this level of posting is incredibly frequent for me. Occasionally, they can get to be months apart. But I am working on that!

Also, the anxiously awaited Will chapter will be here in all good time. I'm thinking of ending this on a Will chapter, to sort of tie everything together. I foresee about six more chapters, maybe, before I conclude this tale (for now, at least). But hey, at the right I'm updating, six more chapters may take another year!

Flamingo


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